I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize