i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
