there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize
