Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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