We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
