$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize