grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
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You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
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mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.