So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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