You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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