Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
