Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
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I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
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I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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