Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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