I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
