I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
