i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
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