Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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