apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
