I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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