whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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