I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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