Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
