Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
