Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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