were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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