you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid