The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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