We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
You're like the curious george of whores
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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