I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
