singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize