hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
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