please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Randomize
