I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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