Got a toothbrush?
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
