i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
