I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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