I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
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I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
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We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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