Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize