Please, let me fuck your mom
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
