the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize