Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
The Olympian is in my bed
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Randomize