I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Randomize
