The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
