my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
