Sry I called you an 8
garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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