Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
operation harelip BJ is a go
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
