is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
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