We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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