That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize