Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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