Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Couch. On fire.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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