you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
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